Thursday, October 2, 2008

I know what you're going to say!!!!!

XOXO, Phoebe here, your sources to understand "human" around you...

A very nice morning, laying on the bed, eating my french toast with coffee specially imported from Mexico, reading some new books I just bought....Honestly its weird, laying on bed at 11 on Thursday?! (For your information, I have to go college at 6.30 everyday from mon-fri) Anyway, Raya-raya(english version for hari raya, i guess) people!

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Wife: John, I've been thinking
Husband: Mmmm...
W: I've made a decision.
H: Uh-huh?
W: I'm going to stop work in September.
H: Well...
W: I know WHAT YOU"RE GOING TO SAY. How are we gong to manage on one
salary? Well we've done it before, and we'll do it again. We're far too extravagant anyway.
It'll do us good.
H: I...
W: It's no good trotting out your line about, "How will you cope without holidays and little
treats?" You saying that really infuriates me! You're virtually calling me a simple-minded
bimbo, which, for your information, I certainly am not.
H: You...
W: DON'T BOTHER TELLING ME I've got some secret reason for stopping work,
either. I haven't, and frankly I take exception to your view of as a devious self-seeking
female.
H: Could we...
W: No, DON"T TRY TO SMOOTH ME OVER. You can't call someone a neurotic
simpleton and then make it all right with a few glib phrases. No doubt you'll claim you "didn't
mean it". Well if you didn't mean it you shouldn't have said it! How would you feel if you'd
come to me with a care fully thought-through plan and had it steam-rolled? Because that's
what you've done.
H: I...
W: No, PLEASE DON"T INSULT MY INTELLIGENCE BY DENYING IT. I
simple won't listen. You've had your say, and now its my turn, or perhaps I don't get a turn?
Well I'm going to take it anyway. I've told you I want to stop work, but you don't seem to
hear me. Or rather you did hear me, but all you could do is go on and on in your usual way
about holidays and treats and me not coping. negative as ever! You don't agree so that's that.
H: Lets...
W: You don't have to say anymore. I get the message. Well all right, I won't stop work!
But just you bear in mind that it was you who bullied me into carrying on.
H: When ...
W: It's useless trying to backtrack now. It's too late! "Keep slaving away."Those are your orders
to the resident servant. Well, okay, I will. But I loathe you sometimes, and one day I'll find
the words to tell you how much -- If I ever get a word in edge ways, which is unlikely.
H: But...
W: I'm sorry, I don't want to hear anymore. You may not have finished but I have! I'm going
out! Good night!
H: (after a puzzled pause) if only I'd kept my mouth shut...


Cabbages for the King
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This is a part of the conversation that I felt interesting when I read the book. Felt familiar with it? I'm sure it happened among us, because we are always so sure we know what the other person is going to say. But we don't. For the wife, I've just got one thing to say to her which is, Can't you just LISTEN to your husband?! Can't you just CHILL for a minute?!! I mean, you sure get piss to the wife when you saw the dialogue above. But think yourself, how often we are the 'wife'? "I know what you're going to say"? The problem is YOU DON'T KNOW!!! why get too big to your boots? We're always smart aleck, tend to thought that we know better than others and that's why we don't listen. If you think you're so 'smart', talk to yourself! Don't talk to others cause you wont let others to say a word!

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2006/05/coupleargueGETTY_228x230.jpg
Such as the wife, we often use our perspectives to judge others. "Owh, you think I'm too self-fish!" "You mistrust me?!" You're pissed just because I stop the job?!" All these phases run through her mind during the conversation. So, whenever the husband wanna say something, she just "know what he's going to say". But what the husband think is totally the other round compare to what the wife think of him. Then, it end up all the misunderstanding, wrong messages, wrong attitudes, wrong opinion...stuck in both heart until the day they're willing to make things clear. So, just stop putting your concepts of others into others, things don't work that way.

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